The Last Days of Leonard Bernstein

[Leonard Bernstein's] emphysema had been a longstanding condition, and for years he had also suffered from asthma attacks and bouts of bronchitis. At a memorial service in 1986 for Alan Jay Lerner, Bernstein's admirers held up a sign saying, ''We love you - stop smoking.'' But despite all the illnesses and the urgings, he couldn't stop, right up to his death.

''The great thing about conducting,'' he said at the time, ''is you don't smoke and you breathe in great gobs of oxygen.''

NY Times Article

More wisdom

Sometimes we're sad or angry or depressed. But if rather than fighting against it, like it's wrong and some kind of disorder, you just relax into the emotion and ride it through until it's over, it doesn't have to be a gut-wrenching experience. It's good to experience these extreme emotions: it let's you know you're alive and feeling.

- words from a wise man

I realize #10

The messiah complex, the need to help people is just that, a need. It comes not from a place of strength and confidence, but from a place of weakness and insecurity. By spending your time and energy on somebody else's problems it is easy to deceive yourself and avoid dealing with your own. "Save" yourself first -only then will you truly be able to naturally and effortlessly become a positive influence in someone's life. Always question your true motives for doing something -never be afraid to be radically honest with yourself. If your motive for helping others realize themselves is to validate yourself and feel better about yourself then your motive is purely selfish. You don't need a reason to help people -but if you go out of your way to accomplish that and you are obviously not self-realized yourself, then there's something else going on.

The messianic wish is not merely a general wish for improved conditions and for changes for the better, but the wish of that private person to become personally the redeemer of the world.

I realize #9

The ratio of birthdays past/future birthdays is slowly but surely leaning towards the first.

Free improvisation

Free improvisation is playing without memory. One must disregard what one has played or how he has done it a second ago, three minutes ago, 10 hours ago and 5 years ago. Thank you Derek Bailey.

I realize #8

If an attribute of another is annoying you, it is because you still have not overcome it yourself.
When people get asked "Why are you ..." they reply "Because everyone else is!". We project ourselves onto others.

I realize #7

You have to be willing to fight, be committed and give all you've got for every step of the way.

I realize #6

The worst that can happen is nothing.

I realize #5

Stay in the game. If you lose contact with it, you get rusty, you lose "it" just like any athlete, any chef, anyone really. Create the circumstances that allow you to do this.

I realize #4

You can accurately measure a guy's manhood, values, personality and maturity by looking at the woman he's got on his side.

I realize #3

Talent and creativity can outdo experience.